This week at one of my monthly women’s circles, the conversational prompt brought to the table was this: “What is on your Bucket List?” (We use conversational prompts to help us dive below the surface in our time together.)
I had a big “aha” about freedom, responsibility, and bucket lists.
I’m sure I’ve had it before, but I’m betting this happens for you, too—some lessons keep coming back until I can really own them.
When it was my turn to answer the bucket list question, I came face to face with this fact: I avoid getting specific about “bucket list” dreams, because naming them means claiming them.
Here’s what I mean:
As long as I leave my dreams very generalized—like “I want to travel,” I can keep them in that “fuzzy” dream status. Once I’ve gotten specific, the next step is to take responsibility for bringing them about. This doesn’t mean that I have to do it all myself, or that I need to know “how” it will come about. But it does mean claiming the dream, owning responsibility for making it my own. I have to decide where I want to go and when I want to do it.
Here’s why I avoid it:
I have a great deal of privilege in my life, including a lot of freedom. If I really want to do something, I can probably figure out a way to make it come about, in one way or another, with the Universe’s help.
“So?” you say, “What’s the big deal? Go for it!”
The moment I name it and claim it, fear arises. All the “reasons” it won’t work come to mind. The next steps arise to be done, and I shrink from them. From decisions, tasks, and foundational “grunt work.”
In a nutshell, I am reminded me that freedom ultimately means taking 100% responsibility for your life.
