You know those days when everyone and everything is stupid, when you want to kick the car, trash your mail, quit your job and rant to whoever will listen? (Not to mention draw your sword and whack away!)
Let’s talk about the power in your grouch.
Days like the above, when you would call yourself “grouchy,” might be days when you are actually feeling rage. “No way!” you say. “I’m just out of sorts. Why would I feel rage?”
Because, old anger never expressed gets compacted. Whether it creates a diamond or just sludge is up for argument. I know it makes you chronically cranky!
My big bad grouch is alive and well—I’m sure it started out as a specific complaint, but at this point, the rage-infused “grouch” is generalized emotion, a wash that colors everything in its path. It’s not about one thing. It’s about many things, often very old things. I mean things that happened years, even decades ago.
Whether it’s up for you right now as well or not, I’m here to encourage you to make space for expressing this old compacted anger—this generalized rage. Make it a required part of Spring Cleaning. Any physical activity involving feet hitting the floor, hands whacking something, helps release anger. Basketball. Soccer. Tennis. Stomping through the woods, hiking poles stabbing the ground. If you are chopping wood, that’s great. But be careful. Emotion and sharp objects are best separated. Scribbling can be helpful—the bigger the piece of paper, the better, and be prepared to break your crayons!
Here’s an important key: For women, rage is often hidden under grief. In fact, if you struggle with depression, it could well be that you’ve felt the sadness but haven’t yet mined your rage.
Because THIS is the power in your grouch: rage is an enlivening, energizing emotion. I’m not saying it’s fun, but think about it—sadness is curling up in a ball and weeping—rage is an explosion, like a volcano. There’s LOTS of power in a volcano. By releasing the dam of your rage, you’ll unleash both power and passion. Here’s the magic:
Anger and passion are connected.
They are both that hot, red energy, and if you’ve got your rage buried, your passion will be impossible to access as well.
Coach’s Challenge: Do it safely, but find a place and a way to express fury this week. (Not at someone else!) Voice the inner howl (wordless rage), channel it through motion. Write about it (lots of 4-letter words and lots of “STUPID” are in order). You may need several sessions—depending on how much compacted sludge you’ve got backed up in that emotional center of yours. The pay-off in recovered passion will be worth it!